lily / mika / g&s
The Lily Allen ‘Alright, Still’ album is genius. It’s got the sincerity, the style, the characterisations and the multi-faceted aspects that, say, the ceiling of the Cistine Chapel has.
Yes that’s right: Lily Allen’s ‘Alright, Still’ album is the Cistine Chapel of pop albums. And yes, I know it’s been out for ages, but so has the Cistine Chapel, and I’ve never regretted the fact that I was several hundred years late in going ‘wow’ about that!
Also recently downloaded:
The Mika Album. It’s not the Cistine Chapel, is it? What’s good about it: Mika. His voice. His obvious enthusiasm. The production is sharp and poppy and the arrangements are a lot of fun. Even the more ’somber’ tracks actually make me smile (sadly, admittedly). I like it a lot. What’s wrong with it? His lyrics. Dear oh dear. Are you familiar with the Eurovision? The fact that the album is, at times, beyond derivative: There are patches where it becomes a sort of ‘Stars in their eyes’ on vinyl (or plastic. or download. You know what I mean).
So, if LA’A,S’ is the Cistine Chapel, what’s Mika? I propose a painting, done in Hopper style, of a pack of dogs playing poker. It’s sort of similar to a few great pieces, it’s a lot of fun, but you’ll be putting it in the garage by the time college is done with.
Still, until that time, I’m looking forward to sharing the spring and summer months with the lovely little Lebanese (no, not kd lang; the other pop lebanese).
In other news: As someone involved in both investment banking and musical theatre, I’m sending you my re-write of a tune by Gilbert & Sullivan, done on a day when the markets haven’t so much as twitched in their sleep.
Yes, I know the sheer lunacy of commenting on Mika’s lyrics and then sending on my own sad scribbles. But my middle name is Hubris.
Yours,
Hubert H Hubris
* By the way, none of this is meant to imply that Ms Allen’s oeuvre will still be around in 400 years. Mind you, thanks to Artex, ‘eperts’, pope Nazi the 3rd and Jihad, it’s unlikely that the Gay hunchback’s* Â efforts will remain in situ either.
*Michalengelo, not Grahame Norton.
Still, here’s the shit rewrite of a classic:
‘An investment Banker’s
(to the tune of ‘A Policeman’s lot’)
Â
When the markets lie as flat as any plateau                   Â
And the dollar hasn’t shifted, nor the pound From each Islington townhouse or South French Chateau You can hear the market-maker’s plaintive sound:“I’ve a mistress and a wife I need to cover      Â
Not to mention half a village in
What’s a
An investment banker’s lot, right now, ain’t fun Â
When the fates of Third World Nation’s ain’t a-tumbling And the World-Bank ain’t involved in one more mess And the politician’s all have stopped their bumbling What will happen on the markets? Can you guess? As the profit’s that, one time, were quite unbeaten Start to slide and are o’ertaken by the Loss Then the Mrs must make do with Knockoff Vuitton And the girlfriend? Well, the girlfriend gets quite cross. Ch: “Wiv the markets goin’ south
at such a rate†(such a rate) “It’s a matter of time ‘til you are chucked mate.†(You’re chucked mate)Â
When the pendulum has swung a little too far
And Expense accounts have been replaced with cashYou can hear the cry in ev’ry City W(h)ine Bar:
“What we really need right now’s another crash. For at least when someone’s loosing someone’s winning And hopefully that someone will be me Which will always take us back to the beginning For we’re nought if not predictable, you see.â€Â ch: With the state of all the markets Neath the sun(‘Neath the sun)      Â
An investment banker’s lot, right now, ain’t fun