all at sea
After Fjordland the other day (which was really a whole day sailing through the Fjords; I.E. you don’t get off the boat), we had two full days at sea, with nothing but, as they say, “Water water everywhere.”
The weather turned grey and cloudy and dark, as did my mood. I was cooking up a nice batch of headcold, and went into my darkess on a theme I like to call “Everything’s not totally perfect, therefore everything’s shit.” Stupid. Very stupid, and, after sitting around for a day, I worked myself out of it.
So, today; another day at sea. Only this time, it’s D who’s not feeling so hot. He handles these things differently to me. I go deep, dark and quiet. My depressions are as slow and steady as the shifting of two tectonic plates: If I’m not careful, they put me in a very different place than the one I started from. D, on the other hand, is more like an exploding volcano: Pop! Crack! Ban! Then Ka-Bleweyy! And chunks of ash and lava are all over anyone unlucky enough to get in the way.
So, today, a small screaming match, during which the words ‘Divorce,’ and ‘Some fucking honeymoon this turned out to be,’ were uttere by him (the former) and by me (the latter).
But the thing is, once it’s done, the explosion settled, it’s done for good, and the only damage is a few devastated villages, a couple of small craters, and a tall plume of smoke.
Screaming over, making up done, the D word rescinded, and the love we feel for each other firmly stated (”Even when you’re a pain in the arse”) we settle in to a day of lying in the sun, listening to music. Reading books. A spot of fat boys lunch (pizza and ice cream). A wine tasting with the Maitre D’ this afternoon, a little snooze, and, as soon as I’m done here, a switch into a tuxedo for the Captains Cockatil Party (where you can spot the ‘mos ‘cos they’re the ones who knew ‘Formal’ does not just mean “Wear a sportscoat and a tie”).
From today’s playlist comes a couple of lines from Peter Gabriel’s Up album:
“Nothing fades like the future;
Nothing clings like the past.”
Leave ‘em both be. Try to enjoy the now.
Tomorrow, wine tasting as I go for a horseride through Wine country. If I’m not in a full body cast, I’ll let you know how it goes.